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down, and she felt them release toward him, responding to his
sexual energy as they hugged. She felt available in a physical,
emotional, sexual way, beyond her conscious control and beyond the meaning of
what was actually true between them. She experienced herself as a woman.
And although she enjoyed the feelings of experiencing this, it was separate from
her emotional connection with him. Her physical, sensual responses to him were
in conflict with the emotional truth between them.
This experience is not uncommon. Sensual experience can leave women with
difficulty drawing distinctions for their own benefit. Many of the women who are
coming into their power and sense of purpose in life at this time find themselves
having difficulty holding on to this in a relationship. For many of them the
question is, "How can a woman be fully connected to the vulnerable softness
and responsiveness of her sexual and emotional nature, in a way that doesn't
distort the emotional truth between herself and the man she is relating to, and
their souls' purpose in relating with each other -- and that doesn't give away her
power and value?" (Although this is from a female perspective, there is, no
doubt, an analogous dilemma that relates to many men, but with different
dynamics.) The solution relates to whether we get into states of delusion in
relation to each other, or whether we are willing and able to be in our present
moment experience, with all aspects of ourselves. Sexual energy can be used to
create states of delusion, but it doesn't have to.
There is a major difference between pleasure that comes from reality, and
pleasure that comes from fantasy, delusion or illusion. People who lean on
illusion, do so because they don't believe they can get their needs met in reality.
This is the result of unhealed emotional issues, which can be cleared. Reality is is
connection, harmony, freedom, joy, growth and evolution.
Narcissism is a major defense system promoted by this culture, which distorts
and avoids real experience, mainly by the use of sexual energy. This energy is
used to attract and control others. It causes immediate and overwhelming
pleasure that has a drug-like effect and can be very addicting, keeping people
coming back for more. It also creates illusions about desirability in people who
feel lacking in their own value. They give up their power to the person putting
out that energy in order to delude themselves they are valued. This is not the
same as being related to by that person or being actually valued by them.
Each person is holding a model of reality (paradigm) in place, individually and
collectively, and these have a large effect. Many of our paradigms, to varying
degrees, are an avoidance of the here-and-now, and therefore a distortion of
reality. They hold a surface experience in place we think serves us, while what's
really happening under the surface undermines us and keeps us from taping into
our potential, evolving and connecting with each
other. They keep our experience of life limited to what we think we can control,
understand and feel safe with.
Current social pressures define the paradigm of sexual relating as attraction
based on illusion (often illusion-based appearance), and is an avoidance of
reality. From counseling many individuals and couples, and from personal
experience, I've become aware that a new paradigm is evolving from those of us
who have a greater sense of our own value, and those of us who have a strong
sense of our purpose for being here on earth. Many of us have worked through
enough of our unhealed issues so that our desires are in alignment with real
experience. The new paradigm is attraction based on our essence expressing
itself. It is accessible, because it's real, something that can be engaged with
and related to. It's inclusive of other people and open to life. When we're in a
state of reality, we can freely, from a place of power and integrity, release our
passion and vulnerability, because it is aligned with life-transforming universal
truth.
sexual energy as they hugged. She felt available in a physical,
emotional, sexual way, beyond her conscious control and beyond the meaning of
what was actually true between them. She experienced herself as a woman.
And although she enjoyed the feelings of experiencing this, it was separate from
her emotional connection with him. Her physical, sensual responses to him were
in conflict with the emotional truth between them.
This experience is not uncommon. Sensual experience can leave women with
difficulty drawing distinctions for their own benefit. Many of the women who are
coming into their power and sense of purpose in life at this time find themselves
having difficulty holding on to this in a relationship. For many of them the
question is, "How can a woman be fully connected to the vulnerable softness
and responsiveness of her sexual and emotional nature, in a way that doesn't
distort the emotional truth between herself and the man she is relating to, and
their souls' purpose in relating with each other -- and that doesn't give away her
power and value?" (Although this is from a female perspective, there is, no
doubt, an analogous dilemma that relates to many men, but with different
dynamics.) The solution relates to whether we get into states of delusion in
relation to each other, or whether we are willing and able to be in our present
moment experience, with all aspects of ourselves. Sexual energy can be used to
create states of delusion, but it doesn't have to.
There is a major difference between pleasure that comes from reality, and
pleasure that comes from fantasy, delusion or illusion. People who lean on
illusion, do so because they don't believe they can get their needs met in reality.
This is the result of unhealed emotional issues, which can be cleared. Reality is is
connection, harmony, freedom, joy, growth and evolution.
Narcissism is a major defense system promoted by this culture, which distorts
and avoids real experience, mainly by the use of sexual energy. This energy is
used to attract and control others. It causes immediate and overwhelming
pleasure that has a drug-like effect and can be very addicting, keeping people
coming back for more. It also creates illusions about desirability in people who
feel lacking in their own value. They give up their power to the person putting
out that energy in order to delude themselves they are valued. This is not the
same as being related to by that person or being actually valued by them.
Each person is holding a model of reality (paradigm) in place, individually and
collectively, and these have a large effect. Many of our paradigms, to varying
degrees, are an avoidance of the here-and-now, and therefore a distortion of
reality. They hold a surface experience in place we think serves us, while what's
really happening under the surface undermines us and keeps us from taping into
our potential, evolving and connecting with each
other. They keep our experience of life limited to what we think we can control,
understand and feel safe with.
Current social pressures define the paradigm of sexual relating as attraction
based on illusion (often illusion-based appearance), and is an avoidance of
reality. From counseling many individuals and couples, and from personal
experience, I've become aware that a new paradigm is evolving from those of us
who have a greater sense of our own value, and those of us who have a strong
sense of our purpose for being here on earth. Many of us have worked through
enough of our unhealed issues so that our desires are in alignment with real
experience. The new paradigm is attraction based on our essence expressing
itself. It is accessible, because it's real, something that can be engaged with
and related to. It's inclusive of other people and open to life. When we're in a
state of reality, we can freely, from a place of power and integrity, release our
passion and vulnerability, because it is aligned with life-transforming universal
truth.
| Sexual Energy: Reality Versus Illusion Printed with the permission of "Vision Magazine" |
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Please note: This Article is NOT erotica. The
initial paragraph is central to illustrate article the
concept of Reality verses Illusion and the
emotional existence related. Your views and
feedback are welcome by clicking here!
initial paragraph is central to illustrate article the
concept of Reality verses Illusion and the
emotional existence related. Your views and
feedback are welcome by clicking here!
Write4Good Research & Communications™